Tuesday 24

 Another Tuesday already? Seems like yesterday I was talking about Tuesday. 

I can't imagine what all this snow looks like from your view, baby girl. You know mommy doesn't like snow. Whenever I first found out I was pregnant with you it kept me from going to my appointment about 2 weeks in a row!! I was eager to see you on ultrasound and was so mad that it kept getting postponed due to stupid weather. I went outside yesterday and wrote your name on the back of my car in the snow💕 and I wrote shades too.  You'd still be too little to play in the snow, but we'd have enjoyed looking at it from the window. 

Since January 29th when you let me find out you were sending me our 🌈rainbow baby🌈 I have been feeling guilty. Guilty to feel a lot of happiness for this little miracle growing in my belly. But then I think you must have had a hand in this. All of the signs you sent me in the upcoming days of conception and after. The signs I keep receiving. Keep them coming baby girl. I will take what I can get since we are so far apart in theory. 

I announced today we are expecting baby #3.  we had originally planned on waiting til 7 weeks at my first ultrasound that was previously scheduled on the 24th. Well, last night I had a little scare so Dr. Sink made it possible for me to come in today. I walked almost a mile to moms car to get to the doctor. The drive was treacherous on the way there but easier on the way back. I still had to walk up the hill at the mouth preachers fork and our driveway. Reminds me of this time last year when I left my car at the salon and walked to it. Only less snow. It was 13 degrees I remember that part about last year. And you were in my tummy about 11 weeks or so along. I remember that clearly. Now this year walking again, different reason, different peanut, more snow. 

I figure if we were gonna announce it, a week wouldn't make much difference. Yes it's incredibly early. Anything can happen. No we're not in the safe zone. There is no safe zone. Not for us. We will worry until this baby comes home with us 

and forever after like all good parents tend to do. If we are blessed so much as to even bring a new baby home. I figure the more prayers and well wishes we can have toward this pregnancy the better, with the knowledge of that there is no safe zone.  I know we sure would've loved to bring you home. The next best thing is to have you watching over a rainbow baby for us til we meet again.  I'm not sure if I truly believe in the whole guardian angel thing. But I do believe you are near frequently and that you had a hand in this. I can't wait to see what a beautiful soul you hand picked for me. You know my heart better than anyone. You and the big man upstairs. 

I miss you still more than words can express. We try to incorporate your memory in everything we do since you can't be here. I hope you can see and know that from afar. 

Love you and miss you so much my sweet Emma girl💕💚💛💜💖💞💓